Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I messed up.

I have been beating myself up for two days now.  Yesterday morning 2 of my boys had a doctors appointment.  My husband had left to go out of town, and I was rushing to get everyone ready, everything packed, and out the door and there on time.  6 shots, and 2 screaming boys later we made it home in time for lunch.

I check Callans bg.  It's 498.  Immediately my mind goes into overdrive.  HOW? WHY?!? I gave him a snack at the drs, but he was running around like a mad crazy man .. surely that would have not made it that high.  AND THEN I REALIZED ... I forgot to give him his Novolog after breakfast. :/

I started crying. I felt horrible. How could I, HIS MOTHER, forget this?!?  This is SO important!  How horrible am I? :(

I eventually got it back down, and there were no ketones, so everything was okay.  I just felt horrible.  BUT I can't beat myself up about it anymore. It happened. There isn't anything I can do about it now.  The only thing I can do is learn from this and permanently tattoo a reminder on my hand and forehead.

{PS: I was seriously not going to post this for fear of what y'all might say.  But I'm just going to go out on a limb and hope that y'all will have some sympathy for this newbie.}

Sunday, October 23, 2011

The DREADED Halloween

Before having a child diagnosed with type 1, I could never even have fathomed dreading Halloween. How do all my fellow d'baby moms deal with this "holiday"?  This will only be Callans' 1st Halloween where he could actually go trick-or-treating.  I am dreading the thought of taking him to the parties we've been invited to, let alone letting him go door to door begging for his bg to shoot up to unfathomable heights.

I have been googling like a mad man, trying to find alternative ideas.  I think I'm on to something.  Do y'all remember the book/movie "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" by Charles Schulz?

 So, some other moms in blogland have put this book into action.  After trick-or-treating they have their children pick out a small amount of candy.  Then they leave the rest of their stash out for the Great Pumpkin to take.  The next morning the kids wake up and there is a small gift in place of their loot 'o' candy! 

I am planning on doing this with my kids this year.  Luckily I still have littles young enough to not have experienced gorging on tons of candy.

What do y'all think?  How do you deal with the candy with having a type 1 child?

Friday, October 21, 2011

The Endocrinologist

I'm not sure that I really like ours.  He's the closest one to us, and that's still almost an hour away.  He is also the only pediatric endocrinologist which means he's always booked.  Right now we are on the phone with him every night.  Giving him the numbers for the day, telling him what we did or didn't do, and then adjusting his long term insulin that way.  It kind of makes me feel a little uneasy that he isn't seeing us face to face and helping us through this.

Last week I got a letter in the mail from his office.  It was letting us know when OUR VERY FIRST appointment would be.   We do not see him until April 2, 2012!   Does that seem odd to anyone else?  Someone newly diagnosed with Type 1 and not even being seen until 6 months later?!?  My pediatrician wants us to switch to another one .. but that would mean a 3 hour drive. 

How often do y'all see the endocrinologist?  What is the normal waiting period?

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Sometimes I feel like I don't know what I'm doing

Last Friday I took the boys out to a playgroup. Before we left Callans bg was 120. About 30 minutes after we had gotten there I noticed him acting strange. He was super aggressive, screaming, yelling, hitting and he even bit his brother. So I checked his bg there and it was 488! I went into panic mode and just started bawling. :( The other moms didn't know what to do or say.  I was trying to get control of Callan, while telling Corbin (my 4yr old) that we needed to leave.  They were both throwing fits, and it was so hard!!  I pretty much sprinted out of there ugly crying "I'm so sorry! He has diabetes!"  

The past few days his bg has been in the 70's - 80's at every test.  I'm not doing anything differently, and so I have no clue why his bg was so high last week and now it's pretty steady.  

Is he going through his honeymoon period?!  Any advice for the craziness that comes with having a 2 year old (think terrible 2's) with a high bg reading? 

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

{2011 is for the birds}

I have finally started a blog.  There is just too much going on, and I feel like my mind is going to explode if I don't get it all out!  The main point of starting this blog is to connect with other families that are going through the same thing as us. (i.e. Type 1 Diabetes) But I feel compelled to share our year [at a glance] with you.

February 8th, 2011:  Our youngest Cason came into this world at 35 weeks.  He weighed 6lbs 14oz, but when he was born he breathed in some [clear] fluid and developed pneumonia.  He had to stay in the NICU for 3 weeks!

March/April 2011:   This was both good and bad!  My husband was promoted, and we were forced to move from  West Texas to New Mexico. It was an opportunity that we couldn't turn down, but I miss all of my friends there so much!

July 2011:   Our youngest son, Cason, has severe eczema. Nothing was helping. We had to make the hard (and easy at the same time) decision to adopt out one of our family members. I really miss this big guy. (He was just a year old at the time this picture was taken. He's a Fawnequin Great Dane.)

August 2011:  My grandfather was diagnosed with lung cancer. I rushed to California (with 3 kids, in a car, alone) to visit him.  On the way back home to New Mexico our brakes went out in the middle of no where. I was alone, with 3 kids. My cell phone wouldn't work. It was horrible!  We were stranded in Arizona for 3 days before being able to rent a car, and make it back home.  It would have cost more to fix the car then what it was worth, so that meant an unexpected purchase of a new car. :(

September 3, 2011:  My grandpa passed away.  I was unable to make it back for his funeral because of our new car purchase. This is still haunting me. :(

October 6, 2011:   We had noticed our 2 year old, Callan, was going through diapers like crazy. On this particular day he had gone through 20 diapers and had maybe 3 drinks. I googled and the first thing that came up was diabetes.  I kind of shrugged it off, thinking this could NOT happen to me, and decided to be safe and take him to the ER. (Our pediatrician was closed that day.)  The ER doctor wanted to let him go because he was acting fine. He was running around, playing, wasn't acting crazy or anything!  He ran some tests and Callans blood sugar was 1102!  He was in dka.  We were rushed by ambulance to a hospital an hour away and he spent 3 days in PICU.  He was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. We are still adjusting.

Last week: I have been trying to start this blog since we got out of the hospital, but something always steals me away.  I had just registered the name (we do hard things .. because c'mon .. we do .. we don't have a choice!) and I heard my 4 year old screaming.  He had snuck a sharp knife into his room before nap time, and was trying to open a box. 4 year old + knife = not good!  ANOTHER trip to the ER within a week of each other!  The nurses kept asking "Weren't you guys just here?" Ohhh yes. Get to know us. I'm sure we will be here a lot.

Well, if you have made it this far, thank you!  I can NOT wait for this year to be over.  I promise I'm not a complainer .. I just really needed to get that all out!   I'm really really hoping to be able to connect with other families dealing with Type 1 Diabetes through this blog!

There was an error in this gadget